"Spunk-e pigeon! Spunk-e pigeon! Spunk-e pigeon!"
"The library! The library! The library!"
"Emilio, I'm gonna need backup."
"Keep your chains handy."
"It's amazing what you can learn from these auto repair books."
"I have something that's perfect for you."
"Frankie the friendly fairy?"
"Now if you'll excuse me, I gotta tinkle."
"Fine, just give me the princess one."
"Bread crust in a meatloaf: how much?"
"Half a cup!"
"Twist ending! Go!"
"So, it turns out it wasn't even a student running the blog, it was a teacher! And he literally tried to frame Gabby with a laptop in her-"
"What does the cow say?"
"Moo!"
"Ace Savvy's real name?"
"Spade Nifty!"
"What time was Mr. Darcy's party?"
"8:00 PM sharp!"
"Einstein's wives?"
"Mileva, 1903-1919. Elsa, 1919-1936...y'all."
"Four-stroke engine cycle consists of-"
"Intake, compression, power, exhaust!"
"Sis boom bah!"
"The sound made when a sheep explodes!"
"Mick Swagger owes his entire career to-"
"Delta blues musician Murky Bottoms!"
"Fashion began with-"
"Charles Frederick Worth! First to sew a label!"
"The greatest of all time?"
"Muhammad Ali! Also prettiest!"
"The night the vampire cried?"
"Trick question. He cried every night."
"Alright, what's the deal, Lo? Won't you just read one book?"
"Okay, Lincoln, I guess it's time I told you the truth. I just don't like pizza."
She's clearly lying about hating pizza.
She clearly likes pizza as much as the rest of the family.
"Well, I'm not moving. So, good luck getting me back in there."
"I told you, I ain't reading, okay?!"
"It's too hard for me to read, so I never do. Don't you think I wanna read about American princesses and unicorns and the Bossy Twins, even if they have terrible hair?"
Lincoln: "We'll get through it together. And you'll see, the more you read, the easier it gets."
"Come on sis, I'll show ya."
"I can't believe it! I read a whole book!"
"Thank you, thank you, thank you!"
"Lincoln, it's 5:30! The contest ended half an hour ago!"
"This is my fault. He spent the whole time helping me to read, 'cause, well, it's hard for me."
"Yes. The important thing is that you're now able to enjoy the wonders of literacy."
"I knew I recognized that voice! The one with the fines!"
"You know, this commercial is so realistic, I totally smell pizza."
"Hey, guys! Now that I can read, I thought I'd make us all some pizza!"
"YOU'LL NEVER CATCH ME, WETTA!"
